magical melodies
Star Wars, Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings Filks by GiNnY / ginnyskywalker

Welcome to Magical Melodies, my own little space in the World Wide Web where I archive all my original filks.

What are "filks"? Filks are song parodies or songs with original lyrics written to the tune of another song. They are usually related to the science fiction and fantasy genre or fandom in general. The term "filk" came into being when, at a science fiction convention's programme, "folk music session" was misspelled as "filk music session". The term stuck since then.

I'm switching to a new layout, so if you click on the links above, it may take you to a page using the old layout or to an error page. But they will all soon be up, so just be patient and keep checking back in. :)

New filks are first published here in the update page (please scroll down!) and later archived. Please use the drop-down menus in the banner to view the archived filks and to get around this site. If you want to use any of my filks for any reason, please do e-mail me first. And don't forget to sign my guestbook!

My Harry Potter filks were first published at Caius Marcius' Harry Potter Filks Site, at Hogwarts Philippines, and at The Shrieking Shack. Some of them may also be found at Fiction Alley Park's Rhythm and Rhyme forum. The Star Wars filks were first published at Star Wars Philippines and at TheForce.Net's Fan Fiction (Fan Fiction Writer's Resource) forum, at the Star Wars Songbook thread. The Lord of the Rings filks may also be found at The Philippine Tolkien Society's website. All filks are published at The Divine Secrets of the Yo-Da Sisterhood.




Saturday, May 24, 2003

TOO SEXY FOR A HUTT
A parody of "I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred

Setting: Jabba the Hutt confidently establishes that, in the words of Christina Aguilera, "I am beautiful, no matter what they say...."

Filker's Note: The concept of this filk was born when Rain decided to play that Sexbomb Girls CD on the way to Joran's hideaway in Zambales....

For the two sexy Stormball birthday celebrants. Heehee. :)

===

JABBA THE HUTT:

I'm too sexy for a Hutt, too sexy for a Hutt
They're screaming for me....

I'm too sexy for my skin, too sexy for my skin
Though it's not that clean.
I'm too sexy for old Han, too sexy for old Han,
On my wall, go hang!
And I'm too sexy for Tatooine, too sexy for Tatooine,
The heat just wrinkles my skin.

I am gorgeous, though I am not thin,
And I can't do a turn on the catwalk.
Yeah on the catwalk, on the catwalk yeah,
Though I can't do a turn on the catwalk.

I'm too sexy for my barge, too sexy for my barge,
Think it's much too large.
I'm too sexy for that chick, too sexy for that chick,
Princess-As-Thin-As-A-Stick.

I am gorgeous, though I am not thin,
And I can't do a turn on the catwalk.
Yeah on the catwalk, on the catwalk yeah,
I shake my pretty tail on the catwalk.
I'm too sexy for my too sexy for my too sexy for my
'Cause I am gorgeous, though I am not thin,
And I can't do a turn on the catwalk.
Yeah on the catwalk, on the catwalk yeah,
I shake my pretty tail on the catwalk.

I'm too sexy for my slaves, too sexy for my slaves,
Go rot in the rancor's cage.
I'm too sexy for a Hutt, too sexy for a Hutt,
They're screaming for me.

And I'm too sexy for this filk.

===

ginnyskywalker
may 23, 2003

ginnyskywalker @ 5/24/2003 10:49:22 AM
>>
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KAMINOAN SPECTACULAR
A parody of "The Pitch (Spectacular Spectacular)" from the film "Moulin Rouge".
Originally performed by: Nicole Kidman, Ewan McGregor, Jim Broadbent, Jacek Koman, John Leguizamo, Barry MacDonald, Richard Roxburgh and Matthew Whittel

Spoiler alert for: "Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones"

Filker's Note:
Merci, Joran, for feeding good vibes to the idea machine. Keep imagining. :p

For Oneal and Rain. Happy Birthday, guys. :)

===

LAMA SU:
Kaminoan Spectacular
Wanna know why we're popular?
'Cause our clones are excellent
Guaranteed hundred percent
All of our clients are content
You won't hear a single lament.
And oh, ten years ago...

ALL:
Sifo-Dyas gave us a go....

CHORUS:
A million clones
The Republic will surely cheer
Fett's chromosomes
Will make troops they will all fear.
A million clones
The Republic will surely cheer
Fett's chromosomes
Will make troops they will all fear.

VARIOUS:
They're loyal!
They're all brave!
Well-built!
and they're well trained!
Matures fast!
and they're smart too!
Tacticians, all!
And fearless!
If only they will all stop hitting their heads!

BOBA FETT:
I agree!

ALL:
So come and look! Come and see! What you ordered from us here!

A million clones
The Republic will surely cheer
Fett's chromosomes
Will make troops they will all fear.
A million clones
The Republic will surely cheer
Fett's chromosomes
Will make troops they will all fear.

Kaminoan Spectacular
Wanna know why we're popular?
'Cause our clones are excellent
Guaranteed hundred percent

This place is alive with the sound of marching...

A million clones
The Republic will surely cheer
Fett's chromosomes
Will make troops they will all fear.
A million clones
The Republic will surely cheer
Fett's chromosomes
Will make troops they will all fear.

OBI-WAN
Yes, but Sifo-Dyas is dead!

JANGO FETT:
Well, it doesn't matter to us
Clones are excellent, no need to fuss!

TAUN WE:
And these units have been paid for

JANGO FETT:
Do you want us to make more?

OBI-WAN (just looks at them but is thinking):
I find all of them funny.
I'll keep that inside...

ALL:
A million clones
The Republic will surely cheer
Fett's chromosomes
Will make troops they will all fear.

JANGO FETT:
I never met Sifo-Dyas.
Just talked to Tyrannus.
They will pay a handsome fee
Plus one unaltered mini Me!

LAMA SU:
We have been cloning for many years!
We are the experts!

TAUN WE:
Lama Su, no one can clone him like we could!

LAMA SU:
No one else will do.

ALL:
A million clones
All perfect, that you can't deny
Fett's chromosomes....

OBI-WAN:
They were ordered by the Jedi?

ALL:
A million clones
The Republic will surely cheer
Fett's chromosomes
Will make troops they will... all... fear...

OBI-WAN:
Your little show? I liked it!

===

ginnyskywalker
may 22, 2003

ginnyskywalker @ 5/24/2003 10:45:55 AM
>>
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COME WHAT MAY
A parody of "Come What May" by Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman from the movie, "Moulin Rouge"

Spoiler alert for: "Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones"

Setting: A musical alternative to the lake retreat fireplace confession scene....

===

ANAKIN:
A Jedi should not feel like this.
My Master has told me that before.
But I am haunted by your kiss.
Everyday I suffer more and more.

Since I met you then, you've been in my dreams.
Though then you shot down my self-esteem.
Now I'm part of a Jedi team.

Oh, I've loved you since that very first time.

Come what may, come what may,
I will love you
Though my Oath I'll betray.

PADME:
Suddenly all I ever see is your face,
Amidst the events that are here taking place.
But your love is something that I fear to face,
Fear I'll truly fall for you.

PADME AND ANAKIN:
And there's no planet too far,
Galaxy too wide.
Call out my name,
And I will run to your side.
Armies may gather,
And clones may abound...

But I love you,
Wish you will soon be mine.

Come what may, come what may,
I will love you
No matter what they say.

Oh come what may, come what may,
I will love you...
I will love you...
Suddenly all I ever see is your face....

Come what may, come what may,
I will love you
No matter what they say.

===

ginnyskywalker
may 22, 2003

ginnyskywalker @ 5/24/2003 01:53:31 AM
>>
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Monday, May 05, 2003

SHOW ME THE WAY
A parody of "Show Me The Way" by Styx

Setting: In the Council of Elrond, where the fate of the Ring is being decided....

Spoiler alert for: Lord of the Rings - The Fellowship of the Ring

This filk serves as a confession that Styx is actually a guilty pleasure of mine.

===

FRODO:

In the Council of Elrond,
Everyone seems to be fighting.
All this just leaves me so confused
As they shout and as they bicker.
If these heroes are seasoned then I'm but a child,
And I simply don't know the way.
But they just cannot cast me aside,
I'll go though all I have is faith.

Show me the way.
Show me the way.
I need a guide
To the Mountain so I can cast this Ring away.
Please show me the way.

Axe and bow and mighty sword,
I consider your oaths sacred.
Gandalf, and Boromir, and friends,
Hope our efforts won't be wasted.
As we go on this journey together today,
and though we've so far to go,
we will keep on hoping we'll get there,
though afraid, we'll face our foe.

Show me the way.
Show me the way.
I need a guide
to the Mountain so I can cast this Ring away.
Please show me the way.

And though I see his Eye,
I still believe
we'll get through this, I know.

Show me the way.
Show me the way.
Please be my guide
To the Mountain so I can cast this Ring away.
Show me the way.
Show me the way.
I'll need your strength
and your courage, I believe
that we will win one day.
Just please show me the way.

GANDALF:

In the Council of Elrond,
The hope of the world's arisen....

===

may 4, 2003

ginnyskywalker @ 5/5/2003 08:35:28 AM
>>
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Thursday, May 01, 2003

IF HE'S NOT THE CHOSEN ONE
A parody of "If You're Not The One" by Daniel Bedingfield

Spoiler alert for: "Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace"

Setting: Qui-Gon Jinn defends his side on his bid to train young Anakin Skywalker

For Aids, whose guilty pleasure is the song "If You're Not The One"... even though there is a chance he might not like this filk. :)
====

Qui-Gon:

If he's not the One
Why are his midichlorians so high?
Why's he the only
human to make those podracers fly?
If he's not the One
who'll fulfill that ancient prophecy,
Then why does it seem
he was sent to us by Destiny?

He seems to know what the future brings,
Yet he lives for the here and now.
I'll make it so
that he will be the one I share my knowledge with.

I will not send him away
And I will train him,
You must understand.
If he is not the One,
Then why does my heart scream how right I am?
I will find a way so he can stay
and be trained.

If he's not the One
then how did he blow up that droid ship?
How did he manage
to give all of those battle droids the slip?
If he's not the One
who's sure to bring balance to the Force,
then why does it feel
right to trust him with our fate and our course?

He seems to know what the future brings,
Yet he lives for the here and now.
I'll make it so
that he will be the one I share my knowledge with.
And I will defy the Council if I need to.
I'm convinced he's the Chosen One they refer to.
On that knowledge I'll stake my life.

I will not send him away
And I will train him,
You must understand.
If he is not the One,
Then why does my heart scream how right I am?
I will find a way so he can stay
and be trained.

Qui-Gon to Obi-Wan:

My apprentice,
Promise me you'll train him when my life's faded away.
I trust in you,
I know that you will find a way for him, come what may.
I know that you believe that I am right,
And that you'll be taking up the fight.
I will always be by your side.

I will not send him away
And I will train him,
You must understand.
If he is not the One,
Then why does my heart scream how right I am?
I will find a way so he can stay
and be trained.

===

may 1, 2003

ginnyskywalker @ 5/1/2003 03:50:15 PM
>>
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Tuesday, April 29, 2003

    BUSES AND TRAINS
A parody of "Buses and Trains" by Bachelor Girl
Spoiler alert for "Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban"

===

Harry:

Hagrid, it's there like you told me.
The train's at platform nine and three quarters.
It's my transport to the wizarding world
I ride grinning like an amateur.

I'm on the Hogwarts Express,
I am on the school train,
Leave the Muggle world
Which is starting to wane.
I left the Dursleys
I think they're all insane.
Oh this feels so good,
Don't wanna go back again.

Aunt Marge, she's been so mean to me.
I didn't mean to curse her, now she's bloated.
Now the Ministry is after me.
I know I'll be expelled, I'm afraid, so I ran and fled.

I was found by the Knight Bus,
Was picked up in the street.
Fell back in surprise,
Stan helped me on my feet.
Thought I saw a Grim,
Hope I've not gone insane.
I left Privet Drive,
Don't wanna go back again.

By riding on the Knight Bus
and the Hogwarts School Train,
Leave the Muggle World,
Don't wanna go back again.
Don't wanna go back again.
Hey yeah...
Oh, it feels so good.
Yeah....

I know, I have no choice.
I will have to go back again
To the Dursleys, at the end of the year.
Because they're the guardians Albus has chosen.

Riding on the Knight Bus
and the Hogwarts School Train,
Leave the Muggle World,
For the magical plane.
I left the Dursleys
I think they're all insane.
Oh this feels so good,
Don't wanna go back again.

On the Knight Bus
and the Hogwarts School Train,
Leave the Muggle World,
For the magical plane.
I left the Dursleys
I think they're all insane.
Oh this feels so good,
Don't wanna go back again.

On the Knight Bus
and the Hogwarts School Train...
Leave the Muggle World,
Don't wanna go back again.

===

ginnyskywalker
april 27, 2003

ginnyskywalker @ 4/29/2003 10:43:26 AM
>>
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Alright! (in distinctly young Anakin Skywalker like tone) It's working! It's workinggggg!!!! Heehee.

ginnyskywalker @ 4/29/2003 09:31:47 AM
>>
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Monday, April 28, 2003

what's happening? so why won't it get published?

ginnyskywalker @ 4/28/2003 08:45:46 AM
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this is a test post. are we ready to filk? hello world?

ginnyskywalker @ 4/28/2003 08:31:24 AM
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                                ginnyskywalker *** april 2003 --------------- based on the design by may